So tomorrow tiny magical elves will sneak into my ear canal and chip away all the bone growth that has formed because I’ve surfed in cold water for 30 years. JK, actually it will be Dr. Gupta but it seems way less scary to just think I’m going to take a nap and magical elves will march into my ear canal and heal my exostosis.
Exostosis, or surfer’s ear, is a condition when bone grows inside your ear canal to protect the ear drum from cold wind and water. It’s no biggie though, there are only three things that can go wrong, the surgical drill can pierce my brain, my facial nerve can get severed so my face will droop forever or my ear drum can be ruptured and I’ll be deaf in one ear. Dr. Gupta has told me that he has never done these things and I choose to believe him.
Let’s all give Dr. Gupta good vibes and wish him steady hands tomorrow. And give me good healing vibes. Oh, I feel them already! Thank you!