illustrated story

Dropping In

sunde white writes and illustrates her experience with localism and sexism while surfing

I recently went down to Southern California for a short surf vacation. We went to the same town we’ve been going to for years because it’s charming, has good waves and as far as I can tell seems to have friendly people.  The water is warmer than up north and the waves are cruisy no […]

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I just opened my shop and now I have a weird eyeball!

sunde white industries gift shop in pacifica 164 Eureka sq

Welp, I have a weird eyeball now. A couple months ago I noticed a bright white spot on my eyeball surrounded by blood vessels.  Of course I was like, “Okay, my worst nightmare has finally happened, I have eye cancer.  I need to start preparing.” But then I visited the Google machine and it’s called […]

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The Healing Powers of Godzilla

Sunde White writes and illustrates the traumatic history of the creation of Godzilla

On the morning of August 6th 1945, the city of Hiroshima, Japan was virtually obliterated by an atomic bomb.  Over a hundred thousand civilians and more than 20,000 military personal were killed within seconds of the American military plane, The Enola Gay, dropping the first atomic bomb ever used in a war.  A few days […]

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Sweetness

sunde white illustrates her essay about a recipe

A few months ago, when we were all still pretty deep into COVID, I did my monthly Trader Joe’s run.  I was bagging up my groceries and chatting with the twenty something cashier about my grocery selection. “These shrimp are so good.”  he said.  “Great on the bbq.” “Yes!”  I practically shouted and then continued […]

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The Drop Out

Sunde White writes about why she left highschool and illustrates her experience.

I really struggled after I left my mom’s house at 14.  I had nightmares and would wake up everyone in my dad’s house because I was talking and shouting in my sleep.  I was having dream after dream all night, every night.  Sometimes they were about blue water and tropical islands but mostly they were […]

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All I Want For Christmas Are My Two Front Teeth

Sunde White illustrates her essay about her bad teeth

Years ago I broke my two front teeth snowboarding.  I wasn’t doing anything rad and awesome, I was actually guffawing at a joke my brother had made.  I threw my head back laughing as we walked, carrying our boards to the lift, then threw my head forward right into the metal edge of my board.  […]

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Weird Large Sleeved Sweater Weather!

Sunde White illustrates an essay about weird Anthropologie sweaters

Cardigan sweaters are my jam.  I love a zip up sweater with a hood.  But I’ll take one with no hood but a cool collar.  I’d try one with snaps or buttons but have just never seen one I like because usually those make me look frumpy because buttons are usually put onto sweaters with […]

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The 3 Best Holiday Movies You’ve Never Watched

Sunde White Illustrates her essay of 3 best holiday movies

There’s something very soothing about watching the same holiday movies that you have memorized every year when they pop up on tv.  But since we’re in the middle of a pandemic and maybe everyone is extra bored, I thought I’d suggest a few holiday movies that aren’t played over and over again every holiday season.  […]

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Conspiracy Pigeons

Sunde White illustrates a weird conspiracy theory about pigeons and power lines

I was at Trader Joe’s today to pick up a couple of free range chickens for Thanksgiving.  It was very busy due to the holiday.  At the checkout, I let the young cashier know I was a bossy bagger so no need to bag my groceries, I’d do it. “Oh cool, thanks!  That helps a […]

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The Funeral

Sunde White illustrates her essay about the fire fighter funeral she saw

Driving home on the freeway yesterday I eased on the brakes on the winding downhill connection between Highway 1 and the 280 because of all the flashing police lights stopping traffic from taking the freeway entrance onto the Southbound side.  As I continued past I could see police lights flashing on the other entrance across […]

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The Beaver Believers Club!!!

Beavers will Save California by Snde White

************************ I wrote this essay a few years ago when I started to realize that wildfires were going to become a norm every fall in California.  I saw the PBS documentary, “Leave It To Beavers” when it came out and I’ve been obsessed with getting the word out about how much they could help to […]

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Andrea’s Crow

Sunde White illustrates her essay about a crow that like raspberries

A few weeks ago my friend Andrea called to tell me about her crow.  She could see him from her bedroom window.  He was living in her neighbor’s yard.  He was hopping up and down and flapping his wings but was unable to take flight. “I think it’s okay.”  She told me.  “He’s surrounded by […]

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Don’t Judge a Dog By Its Muzzle

Sunde White illustrates her essay about not judging muzzled dogs

Sometimes, when I walk by a barking dog waiting outside a grocery store, I’ll stop and keep him or her company until the owner comes out.   It calms the dog’s anxiety down and allows the owner to shop in peace without worrying about annoying everyone in the neighborhood with their barking dog. A couple of […]

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What’s Wrong With My Pie??

Sunde White illustrates her essay about why your berry pie is bad and how to fix it

It’s summer, time for berry pie!  For a few years I had an illegal pie cart called Pie Fridays http://www.piefridays.com)  . I’d wheel it out onto the streets of San Francisco every weekend.  I made all sorts of pies from Key Lime to Double Chocolate Raspberry Crumble.  But I always loved the berry pies in […]

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Pandemicide part II: What is Democide?

Sunde White illustrates Trump losing at COVID19

When I was around thirteen I spent a summer living with my older sister.  One of her part time jobs was to curate and run films for a movie night at the local library.  One evening I was visiting her at the end of her shift when the janitor popped in to tidy up.   They […]

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What My Dogs Are Reading! #2

Sunde White illustrates her dog's book reviews

A Gentleman In Moscow by Amor Towles At first Jasmine thought this was one of the most boring books ever written.  She felt like the writer really loved to over describe things for no reason except for the luxury of it.  “I mean,” panted Jasmine in exasperation, “there were entire pages dedicated to a book […]

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The Wild Pigeons

Sunde White illustrates her essay about wildlife in the pandemic

During the pandemic shut down I have hardly seen any pigeons.  With all the restaurants and bars closed and everyone else sheltering in place there is no longer a free and easy food source where they can manically gather, gobbling up every crumb.  I don’t  see them fighting each other over every bean and grain […]

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Pandemicide Part 1: Eugenics Pandemic

In 1859 an English naturalist and biologist named Charles Darwin published the book ‘On the Origin of The Species’.  It was a book describing his new theory, the science of evolution, meaning that all species of life have descended over time from common ancestors.  It introduced to the public the concept of “natural selection” known […]

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The First Day

I knew the virus was coming for us.  It started in China in 2019 and by February 2020 it was in Europe.  Italy and Spain were completely in lockdown.  Public health officials kept warning that San Francisco was two weeks behind Italy.  In two weeks we would have more sick and dying than Italy if […]

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I Can’t See What You’re Saying

Sunde White illustrates her essay about hearing impaired people not being able to read ips during the pandemic.

I’m a loud talker, my voice just travels.  It’s probably not genetic though, my family jokes that it’s because the sister closest to me in age became hearing impaired in childhood so I subconciously just started talking loud so she could hear me. In the 70’s and 80’s some butcher doctors invented a surgery for […]

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The Pandemic Reminds me of Logan’s Run

Sunde White illustrates her essay describing the movie, "Logan's Run" in regards to government suggesting it's okay for seniors to die for the economy

While I’ve been sheltering in place, I’ve been thinking a lot about the 1976 sexy sci-fi movie called Logan’s Run.  It’s a dystopian story that takes place in the year 2274 set in a protected, domed world that has a computer system for a government.   The domed world is a society of beautiful young people […]

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A Survivor’s Guide to COVID-19

Sunde White writes and illustrates about her experience having COVID-19

Back in the 1800’s, when the pioneers trudged across the Great Plains to build their new life on their homestead, they had to survive any way they could, they were on their own.  When a woman got pregnant, she’d just have to get through it and pray for a safe delivery.  Injured?  Whelp, you’d better […]

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Remembering Typhoid “I don’t wash my hands” Mary

Sunde White illustrates her essay about Typhoid Mary

Since I’ve been in quarantine I have thought a lot about the gross and tragic story of Typhoid Mary.  She was the first person identified as an asymptomatic carrier of Typhoid Fever in the early 1900’s, a disease that causes fever, weakness, abdominal pain, a rash and sometimes death.  A vaccine was created in the […]

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A Tangle of Mermaids

Years ago I went to a Surfrider talk given by a shark specialist that had been studying Great Whites around the Farallon Islands off the coast of San Francisco for twenty years.  He had tons of fascinating information about sharks and left us with some tips on how to know if there is a shark […]

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Valentine’s Day Horror!

I’m not proud to admit that I worked for years at a bar/restaurant that was so seedy that we employees nicknamed it “The Rat Spot”.  I won’t say what street it was on because anyone that has lived in SF will immediately know the actual name of the place. When I worked there, the Mission […]

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18 Sleeping Positions of a Dog Owner

I haven’t had a good, uninterrupted night’s sleep in over twenty years.  Not since I got my first dog DeeDee, a pitbull with very little need for personal space.  Although back when I had her I was single so we made it work, sharing a whole bed between the two of us.  Then my husband […]

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Britt’s Bad Day, A Fashion Analysis!

So Britt recently had a very unfashionable day and I’m pretty much totally to blame.  He walked in from work after a full day as an electrician and I ask him, “Is that what you wore today???” He’s like, “Ya, I met with clients.” Met with clients???  Oh my god.  “What??” He asks me. I […]

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Crow vs. Seagull: Battle of the Beach!

With crows standing up to 21 inches high and weighing about a pound with a wingspan between 35-40 inches, a sharp beak and wily intelligence, I always figured a crow would be a sure winner over the seagull in a beach battle.  But this week I saw an actual seagull vs. crow battle take place […]

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Angel James

James was a bartender at the restaurant where I worked as a dishwasher and line cook.  He was the most beautiful man I had ever seen.  He was like a sculpture or a model.  He was the only person I had ever met that actually worked out in a gym and was compulsively  healthy, always […]

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My Own Personal Poltergeist

I was still a teenager, maybe 18, when I was living in San Francisco in a large Victorian flat on the third floor.  My roommates were all adults in their 30’s and all except one were  lesbians that were cool and powerful and fixed their motorbikes on the sidewalk downstairs.  I was very intimidated by […]

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The Lone Seagull

While jogging on the beach last week I noticed a seagull standing alone,  further up on the beach than the other seagulls that were all eating big crabs left over from high tide at the water line.  As I ran past I realized that he was holding his foot up, just resting his toe on […]

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The Importance of Shredded Lettuce

I hate lettuce on sandwiches and hamburgers because it is always applied wrong.  When done wrong lettuce is a second thought put on in the rush of burger and sandwich making.  “For the crunch.”  People mumble to themselves as they stick a leaf of limp, veiny,  green, solidified watery vegetable onto the mayonnaise of their […]

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Ollie, You Will Be Missed

Welp, Ollie the dog has taken the Hamburger Hot Rod Express up to heaven and we will all miss him terribly.  I only got to know Ollie when he was a bit older.  He visited us one Christmas when his family went away for the holidays.  I had never met such a confident dog.  He […]

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Shooting #1

The first time I saw someone get shot I was about 16 or 17 and had moved into my San Francisco neighborhood the year before.  SF’s Mission District  at that time, was a little bit like the wild west.  Gangs, shootings, stabbings, trash everywhere, needles, heroin addicts nodding off standing up, while trying not to […]

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Toddlerized!

I went to move my truck for street cleaning this morning a little before nine.  In my peripheral vision I saw what seemed to be a homeless lady that was maybe a little bit nutty, walking towards me in a pretty rose colored short bathrobe and white slippers. Well those aren’t going to stay clean […]

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Why So Blue, California?

California is a completely blue state.  The governor, state assembly and the state senate are all Democrats—not a majority of Democrats– every single person voted into state office since 2011 have been Democrats.  We would have been Republican free since 2004 except for a weird election that ended up with a movie star named Arnold […]

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An American Wedding

Last week Britt and I went to a wedding.  It was a quintessentially American wedding in  that it joined two people, with two different cultures and heritages together.  At this wedding a first generation Chinese/Vietnamese American bride was marrying an Irishman that had only just arrived here a few years ago. Speaking with a strong […]

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The Grossest Root Canal Ever

On Thursday Britt woke up with a sore throat. “God Dammit,” he said.  “I’m sick.” “What??? It’s summer time. Get away from me though.” I told him. “You know who gave it to me?” he asked. “ A little kid?” “Dr. Coolum.” “The root canal dentist?” “Ya, he was coughing and had sniffles the whole […]

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Baby Monster, A Rescue Story

We kept ReeRee for Jasmine’s sake.  Jasmine loved her obsessively from the moment she met her.  Ree Ree helped Jasmine to forget all her fears.  When they were together Jasmine no longer refused to go down stairs, or get out of the car at the beach, walk down a city sidewalk, frozen with fear.  With […]

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Is It Me???

It’s been a difficult few months for me for a bunch of reasons that I think I’ll get into as time goes on but for now I’m looking for some input from anyone who feels they grew up in a fairly stable and loving household that helped form them into a stable and kind adult. […]

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The History of The Popsicle: An invetsigative report

Supposedly the Popsicle was invented in Oakland by an 11 year old named Frank Epperson in 1905.  The story goes that he accidentally invented them by mixing sugary soda powder with water and then accidentally put sticks in them and then accidentally left them outside and then they accidentally froze over night.  Then he went […]

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Suck It Up!

I’ve been sucking it up and just getting on with things all week while I recover from ear surgery and it reminded me of a day where I was horrible and mean and terrible to Britt and demanded that he suck it up.  Years ago we went on an early season snowboard trip.  The mountain […]

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Magical Ear Elves!

So tomorrow tiny magical elves will sneak into my ear canal and chip away all the bone growth that has formed because I’ve surfed in cold water for 30 years.  JK, actually it will be Dr. Gupta but it seems way less scary to just think I’m going to take a nap and magical elves […]

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The Key To Self Esteem

How do you figure out you have no self esteem if you have no self esteem to tell you? I started a plant and garden care business at twenty one because I hated working for people and also I was never going to get hired for anything other than low paying, soul sucking jobs.   At […]

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Zero to 1000

Because of her upbringing, ReeRee can go from zero to 1000 on the anxiety scale within seconds.  Over reacting is her thing.  When she’s stressed she growls, lunges, nibbles and then frantically kisses where she’s nibbled, begging you to forgive her.  Being restricted in any way triggers her anxiety and she can lash out, so […]

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Yoga Rage

First of all, I hate crowds so I really can’t stand crowded yoga classes.  But I’m really trying to do two yoga classes a week because it calms my mind, makes me more focused and reduces sports injuries.  So today, since I hadn’t done my second yoga class, I forced myself to go to a […]

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Scones!

So I spent all winter, recovering from one cold or another, hugging my heater and watching The Great British Bake Off on Netflix.  Oh my gosh, this show!  So soothing and relaxing, so British!  The contestants win nothing but a glass cake plate and some flowers but they weep when they win.  And the other […]

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No Toilet, No Problem!

So my cheap landlord hired a grifting contractor that has suddenly found a thousand things that have to get done with our apartment.  The contractor decided that he needed to fix our bathroom subfloor  around our toilet even though we’ve never had our toilet leak before.  He casually informed my husband that they’d be doing […]

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The Hare Krishna House

When I was 15 and living with my sister, we would fill our stomachs once a week at the Hare Krishna house across town during their weekly community meal.  They would welcome us warmly and usher us into the house.   My sister and I would sit in the middle of a pool of orange robed […]

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Getting On With It

I walked by an inspiring blackbird in a parking lot the other day.  His foot was perfectly severed and had healed back cleanly, with no clumpy scar left over so his leg looked like a piece of dry spaghetti, except it was black.  And he didn’t care at all.  He was just hopping around in […]

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Know Your Limits

On New Year’s Day, my husband Britt and I drove our dogs out to San Francisco’s Ocean Beach.  We parked next to a guy that was about to go surf the jumbly, stormy waves.  Out of the back of his truck he pulled out an orange soft top board.  Britt and I exchanged eye rolls.  […]

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Be A Mole

I’ve been feeling kind of, “Whah!  Poor me!”  lately.  Will I ever get to where I want to be professionally?  Is anybody out there who cares? Maybe it’s the political situation that is seeping into me and bumming me out.  The entire shutdown of the US government is not reassuring.  Or it’s last week’s head […]

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Happy New Year! What’s Your Bag?

A couple of years ago, outside of my apartment, a pigeon flew past me frantically flapping his wings but barely being able to fly higher than about my shoulder.  A pink plastic bag was attached to his foot.  With each attempt to fly, just as he was becoming airborne, the bag would fill with air […]

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The Heroic Rebel

So I found a new American Hero this year.  His name is Jordan Blue and he is a high school student at Baraboo High School in Wisconson.  A photo of him during his heroic act shows him in an old timey tuxedo, quarky, with a red bow tie and pocket square, standing in a group […]

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Fashion Analysis: A San Francisco Dad!

I saw this dad walking along Valencia street one morning.  The giant toddler he was carrying was actually bigger than I drew him  because I thought it would look like I was exaggerating.  I don’t know if the dad was short or the toddler had exceptionally long legs but I swear to god his legs […]

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Beavers to the Rescue!!!

I woke up to an orange sky and a heavy brown haze hanging over the city.  Smoke from a fire a few hundred miles away was pressing down on San Francisco.  For the second year in a row I dawned my dust mask every time I left the house and a coating of ash settled […]

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My First Time

When I was 18 I didn’t care at all about voting.  I was a skate boarder working as a dishwasher and living in a tiny apartment in San Francisco with two guys that were pot addicts that played video games all day.  The first time I even thought that about voting was when I walked […]

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The Dog Racist

Remember back in the 80’s when we’d settle around the TV to watch Miami Vice on a Saturday night and every time there was a drug dealer on there’d also be ferociously barking Rottweilers and German Shepherds?  And everyone was like, omg, Rotweilers and German Shepherds are so scary, only drug dealers have them!  Well […]

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Be a Palm Tree

Last week a couple of American cities were wiped out from a giant hurricane.  The people in Florida are still in desperate need of help so please visit AmericanRedCross.org if you’d like to help. I watched Hurricane Michael on TV as it was coming to shore.  It pulled sheets of steel off of gymnasiums, uprooted […]

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They’re Not Laughing With Us

Remember last week when, for 25 minutes, America listened and believed a sexual assault victim?  And then the accuser got his say and started crying and shouting at us and everyone was like, “Gee, okay, if you’re that upset about it she must be lying.” ? Me too. The thing about Dr.Ford’s testimony that was […]

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Jasmine’s Fashion Analysis!

Jasmine looks adorable no matter what, obviously, but I’m going to be honest with you—she does have a tendency to over accessorize.  This is her every day out and about style.   She’s kind of a safety first type of dog so most of her outfit is for her own protection.  Like, she has one collar […]

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San Francisco Gross Out #36

I took a walk early one morning in a nice neighborhood up the hill from mine.  Half way through, I came upon two crows eating a rat.  Of course I was totally grossed out but also worried because maybe the rat had been poisoned.

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Bride of Frankenstein

Two weeks before my wedding day  I went surfing at Montara Beach.  I came up under my board on my first wave and sliced my forehead open with my surfboard’s fin.   It didn’t feel bad but blood began pouring into my eyes.  I climbed back up the sandy path in between the cliffs and I […]

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Buddy

I used to take care of a lonely cockatoo named Buddy. His home was a greenhouse in the backyard of his owner’s  house that was rarely there.  I was supposed to clean his glass house and feed him when Tony, the owner,  was  out of town.  At first I was terrified of the big bird […]

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They Walk Among Us

A few years ago an historically huge swell hit the Bay Area.  It was too massive for us to surf anywhere but Britt and I wanted to witness it.  We drove along the coast oohing and aahing as giant mountains of water collapsed and rolled over on themselves, exploding into the shallower water inside.  Highway […]

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Pitbull Powers Activate!

Pitbulls were once known as the Nanny Dog and the dog of the working class people.  It was the most common type of dog in America.  The pitbull’s warm and sensitive nature and interest in pleasing their owner is why they are beloved pets but it is also why they are taken advantage of by […]

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Maria’s Moscow Mules!

In celebration of our new leader, Vlad, and also as a refreshing relief from the long hot summer, here is a recipe for the delicious adult beverage, The Moscow Mule!  I reached out to the recently indicted Russian spy—oops I mean student, Maria Butina in her DC jail where she is awaiting trial and she […]

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Poo Paranoia!

  San Francisco has a poo problem.   Not a dog poo problem, we have a very large dog poo police force here where you can be bending down about to scoop up your dogs poo and some poo policeman will ask, “Are you going to pick that up?”  Or more passive aggressively they’ll ask, “Do […]

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The Golden Years

  Fact:  Senior dogs are the best dogs.  They know the routine, how to communicate, how to act.  They’re polite, gentle, disciplined and calm.  It seems like they can read your mind, they’re always prepared for your every move. They don’t bound and spring through the world anymore, but who cares?  Neither do older humans.  […]

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Fashion Alnalysis! Agassi, Wimbledon Final, 1992

In celebration of Wimbledon I thought I would share a fashion analysis of the most accessorized player ever in the game, Andre Agassi.  In 1992 he won his first major, Wimbledon, and his outfit was nuts.  I don’t know how he did it when he was so weighed down with all of his fashion don’ts.  […]

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A Civilized Bear

So it turns out that if you have a closed plastic bag of Hershey chocolate minis in a small compartment at the bottom of an 80 pound suitcase full of craft supplies locked in the camper shell of your truck in Tahoe, a bear will know.  Wandering by, late at night, he will smell chocolate, […]

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Hello Ladies!

I finally figured out this spring how to successfully launch a white fly eating brigade of ladybugs successfully into my garden.  Every year I used to try to use ladybugs to kill bugs but it was never effective.  Then a nice gal at my local hardware store gave me these tips and they worked!  Here […]

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Goodbye and Thanks To One Badass Dude

I read Kitchen Confidential when I was first starting my greeting card business.  It gave me hope that one day I could leave my restaurant job and live off of my creative endeavors. It was a beacon of light to help guide me out of the back breaking, mentally draining restaurant work and succeed as […]

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Always Wear Your Boots

A guy on a motorcycle passed me yesterday by driving around me on the wrong side of the road.  I glanced over at him and saw the he was wearing a helmet, a leather jacket and flip flops.  The flip flops made me cringe. My mind flashed back to the motorcycle accident that happened outside […]

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How Many Pounds Is A Whale Poop?

Because my dog ReRe is an innovative go getter she made the decision early on that when she has to poop at the beach it’s best to wade knee deep into the ocean and let the waves immediately dissolve and wash away any evidence of it.  This makes people furious.  They like to lecture me […]

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So Jelly

Last week there was a break in the incessant wind and fog of spring on the coast.  The sun came out and the surf calmed down at my favorite beach.  It was a Tuesday so the beach was empty.  The dogs and I were the only ones that saw the big grey whale surface just […]

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Kitty

The last time I saw my cat, a giant stoic tabby named Kitty, I was 14.  I kissed her goodbye and hugged her big fluffy body to me, trying to memorize her dusty smell.  I spoke to her secretly in her ear,  apologizing  for leaving her.  I knew I would never see her again but […]

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Neosporin is Life!

                  ***I am not a doctor!  This is not medical advice, just my personal life experience!  Please just go to a doctor, thanks!*** ___________________________________________________________________________ I didn’t have health insurance for about twelve years.  During this time I tried to eat right, exercise and prayed I wouldn’t get into an accident.  I became really good […]

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The Swarm

Britt and I were enjoying one of the last warm days of fall, sitting in the water at Ocean Beach, waiting for a wave, when we saw it.  At first we thought it was a rogue local storm raining down in the water south of us.   But it was moving and reshaping itself unlike any […]

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A Joyful Rebellion

I recently witnessed the greatest moment of work rebellion ever.  You know when you’re at work and you’re like, “No one’s the boss of me.  You may have my physical body for the next 8 hours, but you can’t have my mind.”  ?  It was basically that sentiment  being acted out with a six wheel […]

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The Tidy Raccoon, Part 2: Urban Eco-System

I’ve had a dream of growing grass in my mud pit of a backyard ever since I got my big, glorious dog Jasmine.  Her two favorite things to do are relaxing and luxuriating and relaxing and luxuriating on grass.  So this September I dug out all the useless clay soil around my patio and replaced […]

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Why I Love Crows (Reason #27)

#27 Because they play team sports in the air. It’s true, I witnessed this myself a few years ago.  Hiking in a windy valley I saw 8 or 9 crows flying and swooping high above me, chasing each other.  I stopped to watch and realized they weren’t just randomly flying, they were playing catch with […]

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Nature’s Gonna Nature

I was waiting at a stop light one afternoon when a big hawk dropped out of the sky in front of my windshield.  He snatched a pigeon out of mid air and landed with it on the roof of a car next to me.  The light turned green and I drove away still watching the […]

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A Very Sad Dog Story

Years ago a little Brazilian shop opened up next to the place I do yoga.  The owner happened to live down the block from me and I would see her and her little black and white dog, PePe walking to the store each day.  He was a blocky little Chihuahua   mix that liked his freedom.  […]

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The Butt

This weird thing happened a few months ago near my apartment.  I saw a butt.   It was shining in the sun on the sidewalk about a block away from me.  People were walking by, glancing curiously at the butt and then moving on.  A few gross guys were lingering, standing too close and discussing the […]

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My 8 Legged Valentine

My valentine has eight legs, two heads, floppy ears, velvet skin and drools when presented with string cheese. My valentine gets farty after eating eggs, is not a reader and can’t hold down a job. But my valentine is hopelessly devoted, has endless kisses and never judges me. My valentine loves car rides, long walks […]

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Cartwheeling! (Not in a good way)

A couple of years ago an airplane crash landed at the San Francisco airport.  Witnesses described it as “cartwheeling” down the runway.  Cartwheeling.  So now, whenever I fly, no amount of wine spritzers or expired pain killers from the dentist can erase that phrase from my memory.

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Pie Fridays: It all started in a Bar!

I used to have a popular pie cart called Pie Fridays.  I’d wheel it out on Fridays but that wasn’t why it was called Pie Fridays.  It all started on Friday nights in a bar in San Francisco.  I was a bartender there.  I took over Friday nights expecting to make way more money but […]

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Are You There God? It’s Me Sunde

don’t know if there’s a god and I’m not at all religious but this thing happened to me a couple of years ago that made me a little bit more of a believer.  I’m going to preface this story by admitting that,  at the time of the incident,  I was listening to a lot of  […]

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Thank You San Francisco!

Thank You San Francisco!  There’s this weird thing that people in San Francisco do that I think is really condescending, disingenuous  and gross but also funny and ridiculous.  Instead of taking their old used filthy junk to the dump they pretend like they’re doing everyone a huge favor by offering it to us…for FREE! They […]

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City of Pacifica: Stoking the Apocalypse Paranoia!

  An Open Letter:   Dear City of Pacifica, I was wondering if you could please not do an extra long and louder than usual emergency alarm test siren the day after the President threatens earth with nuclear war in a snarky tweet.   I have experienced your weekly emergency siren test many times over the […]

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In Honor of Dee Dee

The only thing worse than losing our beautiful, brave, perfect dog Dee Dee after 17 years was living in a still, dogless apartment afterwards.  The very soul of our home had disappeared.    The grief was overwhelming and paralyzing, but the void of having no dog at all was unbearable. I started trolling pitbull rescue websites […]

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See’s Candies Do’s and Dont’s!

See’s Candy is a glorious holiday mystery.  It’s easy to identify your favorites but what about the pieces that you aren’t as familiar with?  People have a lot of identification strategies but I disapprove of all of them.  Here are my do’s and dont’s. When it comes to See’s Candy you have to take responsibility […]

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See’s Candy Analysis, Part 1

I love See’s Candy.  I was a sugar restricted kid that looked forward to the holidays every year so I could get my three pieces of See’s candy from the 2 pound box. (I have a big family).   I grew up studying and mapping out the candy box so that none of my precious chocolate […]

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