An Open Letter:

Totally Normal
Dear City of Pacifica,
I was wondering if you could please not do an extra long and louder than usual emergency alarm test siren the day after the President threatens earth with nuclear war in a snarky tweet. I have experienced your weekly emergency siren test many times over the years. It is usually loud enough to be heard clearly from a couple miles away and only lasts a few seconds. But yesterday, when it went off while I was surfing, it was so loud that it vibrated my bones…and I was wearing ear plugs and a wetsuit hood! All of my fellow surfers had to sit up on their boards and cover their ears. And it didn’t stop after a few seconds. It went on for such an alarmingly long time that I actually had time to regret not arranging with my husband a “nuclear holocaust plan”. If you could just go back to the good old days of the 4 second, mildly loud test siren, that would be great.
Thanks!
Sincerely,
A Freaked Out West Coast Citizen